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Planning

Planning

Let us plan next five year career. By the way this is the first time written planning; i have planned my verbal career planning many times. Now i understood verbal planning never succeed. This time make a fresh start; plan every thing on Microsoft word, a written planning. The verbal planning has no meaning.

Before planning let us discuss the present situation. I think in next four to five months thesis will be over. Thesis is really difficult to finish. I don’t know how that will be done. Thanks God; the professor is cool other wise another tension of hot professor. Professor is cool but he is very cleaver. I know, he used me. Why he gave me the boring work which i don’t want to do? Where ever you go every body will make you fool. Last time when i was in Delhi university, what was the name yes, professor S K Verma he made me fool. He gave me boring work. And this professor is not different than him. He also made me fool. Either it is India or It is USA. Human beings are always human being they are not going to change their attitude at all.

Oh, i forgot i was making plan for next five year. I think thesis will be over in next four month. I have to do a lot of work to finish early. Nobody is going to give me the job. I know. What can i do? I tried my best. I am lying; i did not try my best. There was confusion in my mind. The confusion is still running. It is very difficult to know what is right and what is wrong at this point of time. But one thing is sure. I have to earn some money and give it to family. Yes once i will give some money to parents then perhaps they will feel good. I will also feel myself free. Money is the best way to become free from relationship. No, i love my parents. But what can i do. My life is a game where only player selfishness, ego and sex are playing. Relations are sitting in the stadium.

Oh, i was planning. Yes, as soon as my thesis will be over. I must have a job in my hand. Who gives job these days?  People say there is a lot of job in the market for those who want to work. Hey, what do you think i am work theft? No, i am not these days my mood is sad that’s why i am not working. These days i am working on emotional stuffs of life. Emotional paper; the blog writings. But why not i am getting job? Perhaps i am fool. I know i am not so talented but what can i do? What ever the knowledge i have; i have to survive only in that. I don’t know how many more years i will survive on this earth. Oh, astrology is so backward. Some time in utter sadness i don’t find any reason for life and when sadness is over i felt myself the most qualified person of the world. What is this dilemma? Let me tell all this to psychologist. This must be a special case and it will lead to a great research. I have a great intuition. I can go for research in psychology or sociology. No, i will not go for research in Moral sciences. Today Tarun (a friend) was telling that there are very few funding available in the filed of Moral sciences. Every body have knowledge of moral sciences from the birth then what is the point of learning them. What is the point of research in this field? That’s why less funding. If there is no funding then what is the point of going for research. Money is superior to interest, every researcher knows. As far as i remember one of mine friend Nitin Gupta is doing research only for money. Why not i also join research for money? I think i will save enough money for family.  But is there any professor who will take me. No, there must be some professor in engineering who will take me. I did not performed well with this supervisor this does not mean that i don’t have ability. I have. But problem is of family and parents. If i start phd then i will not help to them. No i have to help to my father and mother. I know i will be unhappy if i don’t help them. Help is not good word. Oh i dont know any other words. Why not every body is taught English from the very beginning. No, if every body will be taught then what is the difference between rich and poor, what is the difference between educated and uneducated. Thanks God it is the English which gives us respect in the society. I am planning to take French classes. I am superior to rich ones. I am rich as well as educated.

Oh, i am here to make plan. So, as soon as my thesis is over,  i must have a job in my hand. Not in hand in bag. These days who knows they can take away my jobs. I think, there are a lot of companies in India. But why not those guys are responding. I sent my resume to them. Why not they are replying? Some time i think they are thinking me overqualified applicant. My friend Swaroop was perhaps right. He was saying that doing phd is not good, you will be overqualified for Job market. Perhaps this might be the case. If this is the case then it is good for my health.

Oh i did not complete my plan. Let us leave rightnow. i will think and make a verbal plan. Still i have a lot of time.

Dedication : verbal planning

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Track

Track

Am I on the wrong track? Sometimes, it happens that you find that every thing is going differently. No body is supporting you. You seem to be completely different person in the world. If nobody is supporting you this does not mean that you are on the wrong track. I will tell you a new of my personal experience.I was having a personal doubt in my mind “whether one partner should to tell the life history to the other partner or not”. My answer was that yes one should always tell the past to his other partner. I asked this question to some of my friend (boys, and girls). They replied “why you want to know the past enjoy your present you are in the present and be happy with that. They argued, it’s not good to know the past.  I felt bad. I thought perhaps my argument is wrong. We should not to ask these things with partner. I searched in the internet whether anybody who has same type of thinking as mine. Every body is saying that never tell your past to your other partner. I felt very bad; I thought my opinion is very bad. Why I want to know the past. May be I am a bad mentality person. I started to think that my mental level is not as high as others are?
Today, when I was going through the internet, I found that there is a person who has the same opinion which I have. She thinks in the same way which way I think. And her argument is stronger than anybodies argument. I became very happy to read her argument. It seems to be mine argument.
This thing has given me a great strength; the strength is that there are very few people in the world who accepts the truth. Every body just wanted to be happy somehow. There are very few in the world having the same view which you have. More accurately if you are on the different track from others you will not find ant friend there. (or I can call on right track).
Thanks for reading

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Praise

Praise

It was evening. I was in a mood to go to house and take a good sleep after dinner. I just finished my work. I was about to go, I saw one of mine friend Aman came to my office. He asked to me “hey Aditya , today you have to come to my house.” It is weekend so we will go together and enjoy in my house. I agreed to go. I asked,”do we have any special reason to go?” He said yes “your bhabhiji has sent some of her photographs” Do you want to have a look. I enthusiastically said yes Aman I will be very happy to see those picture. I was in a cool mood. I went to their house. He said, aditya your bhabhiji instructed me to open these photographs on the occasion of my birthday, but I opened it today. I can’t wait for such a long period. I said ok no problem.
He started to show me the picture on his personal computer. Bhabhi ji has sent the hard copy of picture. Aman scanned them and uploaded on the computer. I was very impressed to see the picture. I said oohh Aman you are lucky man. These are the very good picture. Your wife is really very charming and very good looking. Her face is innocent. I made a pool of praise and he was very happy to hear my praise. I also realized the same.
 I said Aman can I see the hard copy of these picture. He was slightly hesitant to give me the hard copy in my hand. I don’t know why? But I think due to all pool of praising his mind has started to think something about my behavior, like why I am praising too much. But some how he agreed to give me the picture. I keep looking that hard copy very carefully. I praised once more. And said you are lucky. Up to this point of time everything was fine.  But suddenly he took the pictures from my hand. Perhaps he was thinking that I am thinking something else about her wife. My mind is running in some other direction. He also changed the direction (the photo face back to my eye) of one photograph kept at the table so that I can not see the bhabhi ji.
This incidence touched me. Seriously speaking if I have thought something bad about her wife then I have not felt bad what ever he did. I felt bad because my mind was 100% clean and it was problem of his thinking. Of course her wife is beautiful but not as beautiful as I was parsing. I was parsing so that he feels good. But he did not get this point. And ultimately I felt bad.

Well, now come to the point from this day I have learned a lesson of life not to praise too much to anybodies wife. The other person may think in other way. I don’t say that Aman was wrong and he did something bad. It is general human tendency that he wants that nobody gaze at her wife.
Thanks for reading.

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